Her Body Code



We have an agreement her and I.


I won’t criticize the way she feels and she will keep doing her best.

I won’t judge the way she looks and she will show me how beautiful she really is.

I will tend to her and she will recover.

She will let me know what’s needed and I will listen.

She will guide me and I will follow.


I will not neglect you, I said,

I will support you.

I’ll cheer you on relentlessly.

I love you.


I’ll always remember the moment I made these promises to myself to care more deeply for and heal my body. It was a few years ago, while I was still recovering from breast cancer treatments. Until then I wasn’t fully aware of how critical I had been of my body and how I would have done anything to go back and appreciate how healthy and capable I had been all along.


I vowed never to take this being for granted again, in sickness and in health

and the not so great in between.


I’m revisiting these agreements now, as I’m asking a lot of myself right now and it feels vital to my well-being that I remember.


I’m curious, do you have a pact you’ve made with yourself, I’d love for you to share it here, do you care for yourself the way you care for others? Does this expand your capacity to treat others with more compassion?