I wonder if you can relate to this story, it's personal and I think it's important for women today to notice where they're being asked to minimize themselves.
My Recruiter told me I should lie about the gap on my resume.
I was applying for roles I knew I would be great at. I couldn’t imagine I’d have to justify my time away.
I had breast cancer and the thing is I truly thought I would work a full day Thursday, have a surgery on Friday and be back in the office Tuesday. Wednesday at the latest. My doctors sat me down for a serious reality check but I still didn’t believe them.
I didn’t feel like I had a choice, I had no time to be sick and I HAD to work.
However, one complication after another kept me OOO for an extended period of time and the gap on my resume was noticeable now. But I was ready and wanted to get back to work.
Each interview went great, right up until that question that loomed over the whole conversation.
“Tell me about the gap on your resume.” They would say. Every. Time.
And I would. I would tell them briefly about my breast cancer, and how grateful I was to be here today and…. Their eyes would glaze over, they would say something nice, sometimes even share a personal story of someone they knew with breast cancer but it was obvious, the interview was over.
This same scenario would repeat itself several times.
My recruiter called to find out what happened and he was in shock. He wasn’t in shock because of the reaction from the companies I interviewed with. He was in shock because I told them the truth about the gap on my resume.
He told me I needed to stop doing that, that I needed to say something else, that I shouldn’t be talking about breast cancer and that I needed to lie.
Without hesitation I told him absolutely not. Not because I stood on some moral high ground but because I knew what I had gone through made me a stronger, better and wiser person than I was before. I actually never felt more confident and capable and grateful.
Having breast cancer was a big part of my background and it made me an asset, not a liability.
And I had made a promise to myself while I was healing from my treatments and surgeries that I would not do the things that led to the stress I had been living with when I got sick.
I saw the whole world differently now and I absolutely was not going to live it pretending to be anything other than my whole self in every arena of my life.
I would not cut away some of the most valuable parts of me to fit into someone else's comfort zone.
If an employer or anyone for that matter could not just accept me as I am but rather be blown away by what I can contribute, then it was not for me and I would want no part of it. I would not put myself in a situation like that ever again.
In case you’re wondering, all the cliches are true. Every closed door led me right back to the path I was meant to be on. It was HARD to be rejected so many times, and I was beginning to feel desperate. I did not waver on this though and my belief in my truth only grew stronger.
I’m sharing this today because I see a similar trend happening now with my clients and women I work with, not that they had breast cancer but they feel deeply dissatisfied with the work they’re doing and know that something needs to change.
They have so much more to offer the world and the work they do and are tired of wearing all the hats or simply filling a specific role and checking their soul at the door. I just don’t believe we have any time for that anymore.
It's time that your whole self arrives in every arena of your life. There's no more energy to be wasted fragmenting parts of yourself to fit the environment you're in. No more separating your intuition from your work, no more separating your spirituality from your purpose and impact. You are a whole being, here to live a whole life, fully connected and
If you’re feeling this call too let’s chat and see if The Feminine Leadership Immersion is the next transformative step for you. love@lisamalia.co